It feels funny that Im blogging about TODAY. Because i have always been lagging in my post. Been so busy. In a few days time, it marks the 2 months period that I've been here. Im constantly in a battle. On one hand I really miss Singapore and family and friends there. Yet on the other hand im having such a great experience here and it feels so sad to be leaving! :( Just thinkig about the friends that ive made on this journey. The places ive been to with them and the worries, laughter, everything that ive shared with them will all go away when we leave. Okay, shall not think about it.
Today has been a really bad emotional ride. I think the biggest emotional ride since ive been here. Ive been through so many different emotions today. From angry till i wanna cry (so v rare in my case), to worried sick, to being nervous to feeling satisfied to feeling disappointed and sad to relieved and finally, back to contentment.
Of all the nights to have a party, my neighbours had to have one last night! -.- Thur night is the party night. So I was awoken up twice because they were so noisy. and I sleep like a pig. Im a v sound sleeper. for you to have woke me up TWICE... go figure. haha. Was really tired when i reached school. Then when i read whatsapp from hotstuff and knew what was happening, I WAS FUCKING ANGRY! Like i look okay but inside of me was really boiling. I was sooooo angry and pissed and i seriously wanted to confront those bitches. How dare they do what they did to hotstuff! Made her carry all the bbq food by herself, make her pay for it, make her get drenched in the rain and after everything GAVE HER A FUCKING LIST ABOUT WHAT SHE DID WRONG AND HOW SHE IS A FAKE AND A BITCH? FUCK YOU! I feel so wronged for her. She has been nothing but good to you girls and you have to do that?? seriously? She has been dancing ALL HER LIFE and for you girls to have to destroy a nice girl like her till she wants to step down and leave the freaking dance company, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU GIRLS DOING. Dont judge people when you dont know them. It annoys me so much. She's the nicest girls i have ever met in my life. Nicer than anyone i know in my 20 years on earth please. She goes all out to please everyone and to know that it only backfires back on her is disgusting how ugly you people can be. cut down on the politics before it blinds all of you in what really drove you to join dance. DANCE. not politics. Okay, i realised im still so angry now i want to cry. Tearing now. I HAVE NEVER BEEN SO ANGRY TILL I WANT TO CRY. And when people write on walls about other people generally being fake, DONT GO DEFENDING YOURSELF WHEN NO NAMES WERE WRITTEN CAUSE THEN YOU'RE THE BIGGEST FOOL. YOU JUST ADMITTED YOU'RE FAKE. YOU MUST THINK THAT OF YOURSELF FOR YOU TO DEFEND YOURSELF WHEN NO ONE POINTED AT YOU. And then you create so much drama outta it? okay, im too angry, im moving on.
I was extremely worried. I SOS hotstuff's bf to go make things better for her and for me too. I was so restless trying my best to get his attention via whatsapp. I believe i was going crazy then looking back at my texts. Very relieved when he finally replied. I forgot all about my presentation then. So when it daunt on me i wasnt through w that i was getting nervous.
Finally got through with it and i was very satisfied. But after me the presentation went downhill and i was disappointed but my mood was lifted again when the teacher told me that it had been long since he saw someone approached the question as well as i did. This random girl came up to me to tell me she liked my presentation so i was happy and my friend told me he was v impressed. happy again. Im starting to be convinced that i can actually give a good presentation because my friends have told me that but i never believed what they said actually lol. And i learnt quite a lot of things today in class so that's good.
overall contented. Letting the emotions die down now before it drains me
POT LUCK TMR! V EXCITED! STAY TUNE
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